Sunday, February 28, 2010

Open Letter to Day Cares

When a two year old child in your charge falls off the playset, is unable to walk, and has obvious swelling to his thigh it is probably best to call 911 rather than have him try to take a nap. After you call 911, notify his parents and let the professionals deal with moving and transporting him.

Do you realize his daddy drove him to us in the backseat of the car with a freaking BROKEN FEMUR? Do you realize how difficult it was to get him out of the car and onto the gurney? He screamed the entire time. Do you realize I had to hold traction on his poor little leg the entire time we transported him from the parking lot into the trauma bay?

Paramedics are just a phone call away. They would have stabilized his leg, they would have made him comfortable for the bumpy ride to the hospital, they would not have suggested you try to get him to take a nap.

Thank you.

Oh, and for your information - Children's Protective Services have been notified. The type of fracture he had was not consistent with your story, and the delay in care he experienced was not appropriate, you dumb asses.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Open Letter to Medical Students

My first post is dedicated to the medical students of the world.

Thank you for deciding to go into medicine. I wish you well. Let's get a few things straight before you start. I am sorry your senior resident did not warn you about ER nurses, we are not like floor nurses, we are not like peri-operative nurses. We expect you to get your own supplies and clean up your own messes. That is why when you ask me to get you a size 6.5 pair of sterile gloves I look at you like you have an alien growing out of your head. They are in the supply room, get them yourself. and no, I will not be setting up your procedure tray or helping you with your sterile technique. Get one of your little friends or your senior resident to help you. I'm busy. Oh and one more thing, if you fail to clean up after yourself please expect a call from me to return to the ER. When you get here the entire ER staff including the attending physicians will be the ones looking at you like you have an alien growing out of your head.

Just one more little thing - when we are in the middle of intubating an unstable patient it is very inappropriate for you to walk into the room and tell me that a patient down the hall needs to pee. I will look at you like you have an alien growing out of your head (AGAIN!) and tell you to hand him his urinal.